So…

I finally was able to talk to my mom about getting my septum pierced.

And this is the first time I’ve ever talked to her without getting mad or stomping off or telling her that she doesn’t know what she’s talking about and just let me do it.

I talked to her calmly.

She kept trying to change the subject, but I wasn’t going to let it happen.

Her arguments were, “I don’t think you know what you want.” Which, I stayed calm about, but if this were a different night, and wasn’t planning on getting it done tomorrow, I would have told her to shut the fuck up and stop talking.

I hate when her argument for anything that I want to do is, “you’re such a pretty girl, why would you want to do that to yourself?”

I hate that.

I’m getting not getting plastic surgery, it’s not extreme. 

Plus, it hurts my feelings when she says that because I feel like she’s just using it as an excuse.

She kept getting flustered when I would make my arguments.

I did end up crying when I told her, “I wish you could understand what this means to me, but I don’t expect you to understand.”

My mom’s really old school. But I don’t think supporting your child or accepting them has ever gone out of style.

It just hurts me that she tries to tell me what I should and shouldn’t want like I’m so incapable of making those decisions on my own.

I’m not a baby, and she can’t protect me forever.

It just hurts me that she can’t just accept me for who I am or the things that I want in life.

Things got serious between Abi and I tonight via text message.

We were talking about growing up to be something.

He doesn’t think he can get to where he wants to go because of his impulsiveness and his destructive ways.

But I think eventually he can.

Then he brought up his ex ex girlfriend, who I used to good friends with.

He feels a lot of the blame for their break up, but she’s a bitch for a lot of the things she did to him and to some other friends of mine.

It breaks my heart to think that he doesn’t think that he’ll get where he wants to go.

It makes me cry so much because he told me that in one way or another he lives in misery.

He doesn’t like being happy.

What do you say to that? What do you do?

It hurts because hearing him talk like that scares me.

It sounds like he’s just given up.

And I don’t want to give up. Not on him.

I care about him too much to see him like this.

There’s a part of me that just wants to shake him and say, “you are great, don’t let the past get in your way.”

I’ll admit, I do relive the past sometimes, but I have to think about the future and all the things that I want out of life.

I just want to wrap my arms around him until I can’t anymore.

My heart aches so much for him.

I’m so afraid of what might me happening to me in this situation.

My heart hurts for him. 

I miss him so much when we’re apart.

I think about him all the time everyday.

I think of any excuse to text him.

I don’t want to get my hopes up only to be crushed.

But I don’t know why I keep feeling so strong about him.

I’ve never wanted to be with someone as much as I want to be with Abidan.

I’m so scared of what might be happening to us. To me.

I want to know what itʼs like… 
To live in a land truly of the free. 
Not a land that excludes me. 
This is not how itʼs supposed to be! 

I just watched this video, and this part made me tear up.

I’ve said it so many times, and I will never stop.

It hurts to know that in a country that promises liberty and the pursuit of happiness, that the government will even take those away from you.

And for what?

Just because you were born a way that you can’t change?

Sexuality is no different from the color of your skin or any other trait that you’re born with.

I wish people would open their minds and try to understand that.

Until everyone is equal, I will never stop fighting for what’s right.

My cousin and his wife had their first baby. Baby Andrew Philip was born tonight. 7 pounds, 20 inches long.

He was moving, sticking his tongue out, and had a case of the hiccups.

The first child for them.

My aunt and uncle’s first grandkid,

My cousin’s first nephew.

Such a great night for my family and for the mommy’s family.

Very excited for this new little one in the family! :)

I took 5 minutes of my life to make this.

I…I have no life.

*note: this is from my birthday party when I turned 17.

I think we look cute together.

Again…no life.

For all the likes and reblogs.

Especially because I can see that you’re reblogging stuff that I blogged months ago.

Stuff I forgot I even had on my blog.

I feel honored to be one of the blogs that you follow.

Thank you very much! :)